Chanticleer #26

Chanticleer
I do not propose to write an ode to dejection, but to brag as lustily as chanticleer in the morning, standing on his roost, if only to wake my neighbors up. 

Henry David Thoreau

March 26, 2001

“Chanticleer Calls”, a whenever-I-get-around-to-it newsletter for discriminating readers, thinkers, feelers, speakers, listeners, and cogitators.


SEEING

“The real voyage of discovery consists not in seeking new landscapes, but in having new eyes.” – Marcel Proust
“A person does what he does because he sees the world as he sees it. – Alfred Korzybski
“We see the world as ‘we’ are, not as ‘it’ is; because it is the “I” behind the ‘eye’ that does the seeing.” – Anais Nin
“We see what we see because we miss all the finer details.” – Alfred Korzybski

At two score and seven, I’m forced to confess the inevitable frailty that follows us all — lurking unseen like a shadow facing the sun.

Chanticleer wears bifocals. Crow, crow!

I’ve had them for a week now. It’s been a weak week.

I have the “progressive” (doesn’t “regressive” sound more descriptive?) lenses, meaning that there is not the clearly-defined line separating the magnifying lens at the bottom from the corrective lens above. So to the observer, they appear to be “normal” glasses. And the lightweight, stylish titanium frames are not unattractive.

However, from the business-end of these “progressive” lenses, they look much differently.

Imagine taking a load of Vaseline and smearing it around the outside third of your glasses, or sunglasses. That’s the effect I’m adjusting to with these bifocals. Nothing is in focus unless it’s right in the “sweet spot” of my “progressive” lenses. Peripheral vision? Like the Southwest Conference … it’s history.

So quite literally, I “see” differently.

The most obvious change is that I now have to move my whole head (which, as some of you know, can be a challenge in itself) instead of just shifting my eyes. Not that I was all that shifty-eyed to begin with. But now I have to try and keep my eyes in a fixed relationship with the lenses. So I look like one of those ’60s service station giveaway football dolls with the over-sized helmets that bounce uncontrollably from the rear deck of the car in front of you.

Yep. “Slingin’ Steve” has become “Swivelin’ Steve”.

Looking at my monitor as I type on the bottom of the screen, I have to tilt my head up to read the menu bar at the top of the screen. Now, I have to turn my head around to look for traffic before I change lanes, instead of casually glancing. It’s as though I’m continually “zeroing in” on what it is I’m trying to see. I was in a sports bar the other night, and even looking at the TV screens clear across the room, I had to ratchet my head a few degrees each time to focus on each individual TV. It’s like I’ve become a scanning radar.

The experience has, however, given me a greater sense of, and appreciation for, “individuality” – how I/we inevitably see things differently from anyone else. And how I/we see things differently from the way I/we used to see them.

Some notions that might help us all to see with “new eyes” as we continue the “voyage of discovery”: We each have a different “corrective prescription” for achieving out best visual acuity Even with our vision “corrected”, we still each have varying degrees of what we can, and choose to, see What appears to be clear for some, may appear to be ambiguous or fuzzy for others How we see, and what we see, is to some degree a function of our past experiences, how we’ve adjusted to our individual “corrective prescriptions” Sometimes we can’t see things clearly until we shift our perspective, until we look at them from a slightly different angle.


“IRONY”

Some of you know that the last five months of my life have revolved around a little diversion called He-Said-She-Said. I met a female friend through an online dating service, we decided to write an unofficial ‘newsletter’ within the online system, we expanded the concept to include a website, we hosted a couple of large parties that drew 400-500 people, we raised $4,000 for a slain police officer’s family, and we developed something of a rapport and reputation with about 800 other adult singles.

The results from this little diversion were so encouraging that we felt we could make it a business. In fact, I felt so strongly in our potential that I gave notice at my job with the intent to focus on growing this into an actual business. We were going to develop the online website while providing a variety of offline offerings, from the full-blown large parties to small dinner parties to “relationship coaching” discussion forums.

But something happened on the way to the forums.

Remember the joke from the Woody Allen movie, Annie Hall — “Those that can’t do, teach. And those that can’t teach, teach gym.”

Well, the prospective relationship “coaches” encountered a few irreconcilable perspective differences themselves. Forget about “coaches” … is there a doctor in the house?

Talk about putting the “I” in “Irony”.

The underlying notion that inspired He-Said-She-Said … the notion of different perspectives … foretold its demise. What happened? It depends … there’s what He-Said, then there’s what She-Said.

In other words, even though there might be no dispute regarding four of five key ‘facts’, the “story” that takes those ‘facts’ and weaves them together to relate intentions, motivations, results, consequences, etc., will vary with each individual. Each person will tell “a story”, not “the story”.

So … that’s this character’s speech about the He-Said-She-Said ‘play,’ now fully aware of the incongruity.

It’s all about the irony.


WEATHER OBSERVATIONS

A few weeks ago, we had a long-forecasted line of thunderstorms move through the DFW area late on a Saturday morning. I rushed around early that morning to get some errands run so I could get home before the storms began producing “local effects.”

When I got home, I came in and turned on the TV so I could watch the storms approach on the Weather Channel’s radar. As I sat down to look at the TV screen, I had a sudden thought: If I want to ‘see’ the storm approach, why am I sitting inside looking at a television image of a radar image of the storm? Why am I not outside actually experiencing the approaching storm, ‘seeing’ it for myself? There’s something to be said for occasionally experiencing things for yourself, rather than relying on the interpretations and representations from others’ experiences. But consider an umbrella.


AND FINALLY

This is the season for potholes in the Dallas-Fort Worth area. Where does the “stuff” that becomes the “hole” go when the “hole” is formed? Does it evaporate? Does it sink? Is there, like, a whole freeway system somewhere underneath the roads? I’m still scratching my head over how one inch of rain can cause a lake to rise by a foot.

A great lyric by Ivan Lins in his song “Love Dance” – Turn up the quiet, Love wants to dance.

Chanticleer #25

Chanticleer
I do not propose to write an ode to dejection, but to brag as lustily as chanticleer in the morning, standing on his roost, if only to wake my neighbors up. 

Henry David Thoreau

February 25, 2001

“Chanticleer Calls”, a whenever-I-get-around-to-it newsletter for discriminating readers, thinkers, feelers, speakers, listeners, and cogitators.


IRONY RULES

In case you missed it, the 43rd Annual Grammy Awards show was broadcast on February 21st. My daughter came over to watch it with me, and it provided a good opportunity for inter-generational communication. I had the chance to explain Steely Dan to her, and she tried to explain Blue Man Group to me.

The awards part of the show was upstaged by the live performances, and the live performances were in turn upstaged by the much-anticipated, much-mentioned “controversy” regarding Elton John’s duet with Eminem. (More on that later.)

The theme of the night, from my perspective, was “Irony Rules”. Such as:

  • The “Best New Artist” award went to Shelby Lynne, who’s been performing for 13 years and has released 6 albums prior to her “discovery” last year.
  • Despite the over-the-top visual effects, stage extravaganzas and bared skin clearly geared to the tastes and sensitivities of the MTV generation, the top awards of the night went to the two veteran bands, U2 and Steely Dan. Watching them accept their awards, I was tempted to check my remote control to make sure my satellite receiver hadn’t jumped momentarily to the History Channel.
  • It was hard to watch Madonna’s opening performance of “Music”, knowing that the 42-year-old-mother-of-a-toddler “Material Girl” is hardly “Like A Virgin” anymore.

“ALWAYS …”

Friday night I saw the two-person musical, “Always … Patsy Cline”, based on the true story of Patsy Cline’s encounter with an adoring fan.

This was at Bass Performance Hall in Fort Worth, truly a world-class stage venue. However, on this particular evening, the audience that was seated around us was hardly “world-class.” Perhaps because Patsy Cline died in 1963, the crowd was predominantly ‘older’; relatively-speaking in my case, that means over 60. And unfortunately, their behavior wasn’t exactly up to what you might expect from a “theater crowd.”

For example, the guy behind me kept tapping his foot on my seat back like he was at home in his LaZBoy munching beer nuts. (To make matters worse, he tapped on the on-beat.) And at the end of every song that he knew, instead of just clapping, he emitted this strange, “Ahhhhh-YEEEEE!” sound.

Several ‘older’ ladies around us, bless their hearts, enjoyed themselves so much I had to wonder if they’d laughed out loud since Col. Henry Blake left M*A*S*H.

And I thought it was interesting to observe this group laughing uproariously at a questionable R-rated ‘barnyard epithet’ used late in the show. I mean, I could see these same ladies walking out of Rent at the first mention of it. But perhaps because they were watching contemporary characters from their ‘innocent’ youth, they were more tolerant and accepting than watching the behavior of their grandchildren’s generation(s). I don’t know.

I was familiar with some of the more popular songs, like “I Fall to Pieces,” “Walking After Midnight,” and, of course, Willie Nelson’s “Crazy.” But the lyrics of a song I didn’t know really struck a chord (ahem) with me, particularly since I’ve been so immersed lately in stuff related to dating and relationships.

From “She’s Got You”, by Hank Cochran:

I’ve got the records
That we used to share,
And they still sound the same
As when you were here
The only thing different,
The only thing new,
I’ve got the records,
She’s got you.

OUCH! I hate when that happens ..


MOOD MUSIC

Saturday morning I was washing dishes and listening to the ’70s music channel on my DirecTV, and the Fifth Dimension’s “(Last Night) I Didn’t Get To Sleep At All” came on. I had to stop what I was doing and listen to it. Because as soon as I heard the opening piano clinks, I was a heart-broken teenager listening to the ‘same’ song on a school bus coming home after a high school basketball game in 1972.

I’ve grown up surrounded by music. I take it for granted. But every now and then, I have a moment when I appreciate the tremendous power it can have to influence my attitude and mood. (Atti-mood? Mood-itude?)

There’s a great Hewlett-Packard TV commercial now that talks about the “soundtrack of your life.” I think it’s interesting to note what music we choose to listen to when we want to evoke certain feelings, or change certain moods.

Sometimes we’re down and want to get downer, so we listen to blues like Keb Mo – “What goes around, comes around … and it’s all coming back to me now”, or Buddy Guy’s “You Damn Right I Got the Blues”.

Sometimes we’re down and want a pick-me-up, and something like Phil Collins’ “Easy Lover” or Frank’s “The Most Beautiful Girl in the World” or Stevie Wonder’s “Do I Do” or Santana and Rob Thomas’ “Smooth” can instantly make our fingers snap, our toes tap, and lift us out of our temporary doldrums.

Sometimes we just want to wallow in whatever mood we find ourselves … “Bewitched, Bothered and Bewildered” …. “Walking My Baby Back Home” … “Losing My Religion” … “Let It Be” … “Popsicle Toes”… “Walk Like An Eqyptian”.

(Hey, don’t you sometimes get in one of those Sphinx-like moods?)

But if we’re aware of how we respond to music … and how we’re affected by it … maybe we can use that to our advantage, to help us “get by with a little help from our (musical) friends.”


EMINEM and ELTON

As I mentioned before, the buzz throughout the Grammy Awards was the featured performance pairing Eminem with Elton John.

To explain for you non-MTV-generation readers … Eminem (pronounced “M & M”, but not the candy), the rapper (but not the candy wrapper), is about the most controversial figure in the pop music world today. He’s a white rapper who has offended and angered just about every identifiable group – principally gays and women – with his defiantly and unapologetically profane lyrics.

His “The Marshall Mathers LP” (get the Eminem now?) was nominated for album of the year, and his single, “The Real Slim Shady,” was nominated for (and won) the Grammy for Best Solo Rap Performance.

Enter Elton John, the formerly flamboyant, flaming and flaunting Captain Fantastic, whose once-questionable bi-sexuality has since been settled and accepted. With his Aida now a Broadway smash, he’s about as “establishment” as any ultra-mega-superstar can be.

Not to mention, of course, that he was knighted by Queen Elizabeth II in 1997 and is now Sir Elton John.

Sir Elton agreed to perform with surly Eminem on the rapper’s current hit about an obsessive, suicidal fan, “Stan”.

Of course, the knighted, noble gay activist performing with the nihilistic, ignoble gay basher produced all sorts of legitimate, and self-serving, controversies among all sorts of advocacy groups. It seemed the entire awards show was merely the pre-game warmup to the real show – Eminem and Elton.

“Stan” is not for the faint of heart, nor the weak of willpower. If you’re quick to scream “Obscene!” and “Profane!”, you’ll lose your voice listening to this one.

So why would Sir Elton John agree to not only perform this song, but perform with this artist?

I don’t know, but I suspect two possible reasons.

First, given his own controversial career, I suspect Elton John can relate to Eminem as a pop culture figure (icon?) to a degree that few others can. He might be able to relate to him on an artist-to-artist level that supercedes the message-of-the-artist level.

Secondly, and I’m only surmising here, but Elton John might be a sharp behaviorist. Many gay rights activists were infuriated that he was so obviously and transparently trying to “build a bridge” with someone who seemed so offensive and vile to their purposes.

But think about how this gesture, culminating with their post-performance embrace, might – might – affect Eminem’s future behavior, and lyrics, and attitudes. Perhaps Sir Elton John is smart enough – wise enough – to realize the insignificance of condemning Eminem’s past words and behavior, and instead act in an attempt to change his future words and behavior.

Can anyone expect that performing on the world stage with Sir Elton John will not affect Eminem in some positive way? Perhaps music has the power not only to change the moods of listeners like me, but perhaps it can also change the attitudes of the music makers themselves. Let’s watch, and listen.


FRANK and EMINEM

I prepared a presentation for the Language Resource Center at Notre Dame last September, titled “The Language of Awareness: Taking Responsibility for Meanings.” To illustrate how we sometimes are not necessarily consistent in our “meanings”, I took a snippet from that mainstream anthem of individuality, Paul Anka’s “My Way” sung by Frank Sinatra:

For what is a man, what has he got?
If not himself, then he has naught.
To say the things he truly feels;
And not the words of one who kneels.
The record shows I took the blows –
And did it my way!

Don’t we all extol the virtue of those who “say the things” they “truly feel, and not the words of one who kneels”?

Then I played an excerpt of Eminem’s “The Real Slim Shady“:

I’m like a headtrip to listen to ’cause I’m only givin’ you
Things you joke about with your friends inside your living room
The only difference is I got the balls to say it in front of ya’ll
And I don’t gotta be false or sugarcoated at all
I just get on the mic and spit it and whether you like to admit it
I just s— it better than 90% of you rappers out can
Then you wonder how can kids eat up these albums like valiums

So now the problematic question is, if you agree with the sentiment and the virtues of the class song-ish “My Way,” how do you then logically condemn Eminem’s manifesting that virtue of “saying the things he truly feels“?


PERSPECTIVE

I can’t say that I approve, or even necessarily like, Eminem or any of the rap genre music. However, before we perfunctorily dismiss rap as “that’s not music,” we might put it in some historical context.

Swing, jazz, rockabilly, country, Elvis, rock ‘n roll, the Beatles, bubble gum, heavy metal, disco, punk … at the time each appeared on the scene as “fresh,” naysayers condemned each as “not music” based on what was accepted at the time. And yet now with some historical distance, we can appreciate the migration and fusion of these different styles. (Granted, maybe disco was a bad example …)

Who knows, perhaps twenty-eight years from now, my daughter will be washing dishes and have to stop and fondly reflect on her youth when she hears:

I’m sick of you little girl and boy groups, all you do is annoy me
So I have been sent here to destroy you
And there’s a million of us just like me, who cuss like me
Who just don’t give a f— like me
Who dress like me, walk, talk and act like me
It just might be the next best thing, but not quite me
‘Cause I’m Slim Shady
Yes, I’m the real Shady
All you other Slim Shadys are just imitating
So won’t the real Slim Shady please stand up
Please stand up, please stand up

Or, maybe not.

Maybe in twenty-eight years she’ll still be the “World’s Oldest Hanson Fan.”

“Always.”

Chanticleer #24

Chanticleer
I do not propose to write an ode to dejection, but to brag as lustily as chanticleer in the morning, standing on his roost, if only to wake my neighbors up. 

Henry David Thoreau

February 1, 2001

“Chanticleer Calls”, an aperiodic newsletter for discriminating readers, thinkers, feelers, speakers, listeners, and cogitators.


UPDATE ON RE-STRIPING

From the September 17, 2000 files … I commented on the Texas Department of Transportation’s approval of a $134,000 re-striping project to add an additional exit lane from Woodall-Rogers Freeway around downtown Dallas onto US 75 North Central Expressway. The project was to take six weeks.

Nineteen weeks later, the six week effort has yet to begin.


“STRAIGHT FROM THE HEART”

You probably don’t subscribe to the “STRAIGHT FROM THE HEART” email list. I mention it because the guy who runs it contacted me a few weeks ago and asked permission to re-print an anecdote I wrote called “The Girl and the Match”. This story about Alfred Korzybski’s encounter with a college student reflects his unique approach to teaching a few pertinent points about general semantics.

I had forgotten about it until yesterday, when I received the newsletter and there it was – “The Girl and the Match”, by Steve Stockdale. I’ve already received four nice emails today from readers around the country, so I thought I’d mention that if you haven’t read it, you can on my website.


CHOCOLAT

I saw the movie Chocolat. I highly recommend it for anyone who considers him/herself to be the least bit “open-minded.” And I think its message applies to dating and relationships … no matter how tolerant or open-minded we are, we’re each driven to some degree by preconceived ideas and assumptions about what we’re “supposed to do.” We each carry our own personal bag of “shoulds”. “I don’t like somebody who ….”, “I don’t enjoy ….”, “I would never …”, “You’re not supposed to ….”, “You shouldn’t …”

In some cases these apriori premises are appropriate. In other cases, however, we’re like children who say, “I don’t like asparagus.”

“Have you ever TRIED asparagus?”

“No. But I know I wouldn’t like it.”


Last spring I drove to Chicago. While passing through St. Louis, I called some friends to meet for lunch. They gave me directions to a particular freeway intersection. I looked at my road atlas, the one I’d had for 20 years, the one that I’d used to drive all over the western U.S., the one that had all kinds of notes and mileage and phone numbers scribbled on it. The one I wouldn’t THINK about leaving at home when I traveled.

This intersection wasn’t on my map. My map was out of date. The freeway system had changed, but my map hadn’t. I needed a new map.

Chocolat is about giving yourself permission to try new things, to make new ‘maps.’

You might ask yourself if you’re carrying around any old ‘maps’ that need to be replaced, or at least updated.


What DELETE ‘Means’

I’ve been offering some commentary about dating-while-adult and recently addressed the hot topic of, what does it mean when you see that a recipient has deleted your email (which one online service offers as a “feature”):

I’m still getting mail about the Matchmaker.com “DELETE” button, and what it means when you see that someone has “DELETED” your mail.

First, does everybody understand that on Matchmaker.com “DELETE” doesn’t really mean “DELETE”? When you “delete” mail, it goes into “Old Mail”. (Actually, even your “New Mail” is in “Old Mail”, but I’ll try to keep this simple.)

Even within the Matchmaker documentation and Help file, there are references not to “deleted mail”, but “archived mail”.

So how much difference does that label make? Would you feel differently if the button were labeled “ARCHIVE” instead of “DELETE”? What does “archive” mean?

Well, it kinda means, “SAVE”, doesn’t it?

So all the guys (and some women) who moan and groan and whimper that “she DELETED my mail without a reply” … would you then moan and groan and whimper, “she SAVED my mail without a reply”?

Perhaps not.

Sometimes we need to recognize a label as merely a label, and not as a premeditated action with specific intent.


Close Encounters of the Rented Kind

Do you remember this scene from Close Encounters of the Third Kind? The one where Richard Dreyfus is led to Devil’s Tower, and he stumbles into the government staging area where they’re preparing to receive the aliens?

He’s taken into custody, then you see him in the back of a van with about a dozen other befuddled civilians. The camera pans around the inside of the van and you see each individual, one by one, only as a pair of huge, wide-open eyes, peering out from behind the thick, murky glass lenses of a gas mask.

Each set of eyeballs desperately searches the others for some clue as to why they are there, together, at that particular place and time. They each realize that they share something, but they don’t know what.

I see some similarities between that movie scene and the ‘real world’ that many of us find ourselves in – the world of ‘adult’ online dating.

We find ourselves – some led by intention, some by accident – thrust together in the back of this online cyber- ‘van’. We struggle to look for some reason, some commonality, some communal sense that “we’re all here together, and somehow everything’s going to be okay.” We don’t know these other eyeballs that are peering out, searching our eyeballs for the same assurances we seek in theirs.
We don’t understand, but we accept with some fear, and much uncertainty.

Which makes it all the more difficult for me to understand why some of ‘us’ choose to engage in such vicious, personal attacks against others of ‘us’ who are a part of this group.

Here we all are, peering out with bug-eyed suspicions and curiosities, at each other in the back of this online cyber-van … and a few of us decide that another one of us doesn’t belong here. And some of ‘us’ say things via email to me, and to others, that we would NEVER consider saying face-to-face, or in front of our kids, or in front of our boss, or in front of ANYBODY – if there were any possibility of personal accountability.

Isn’t that …. ‘special’?

Now migrating east from Wyoming to the Lower East side of New York City….
I love the musical Rent. From the song, “I’ll Cover You”

“I think they meant it
When they said you can’t buy love
Now I know you can rent it
A new lease you were, my love – on life.”

From “What You Own”

“And when you’re living in America
At the end of the millenium
You’re what you own.

“So I own not a notion
I escape and ape content
I don’t own emotion – I rent.”

We ‘rent’ time on Matchmaker. We ‘rent’ someone when we spend time reading her profile. We ‘rent’ someone when we choose to spend time writing, responding, reacting to her. We ‘rent’ someone when we meet her, when we’re out on a date. We ‘rent’ her when we daydream, when we fantasize, when we tell our friends about her. What we ‘rent’ is temporal, ephemeral. And when our ‘rental’ period is over, “she” remains.

And yet … many of us write as if we ‘own’ the person we’re writing to, or talking about. We make use of what serves our purposes, and then we discard the rest as we discard the wrapper around a Payday. We throw out people like we throw out trash, as if we feel we are doing everyone else a favor by “putting the trash in its place.”

There’s also this phrase from “What You Own” —
“Connection, in an isolating age.”

Some of you might not know what the reference to “The Third Kind” means. An encounter of the “first kind” is a sighting; the “second kind” refers to physical evidence left behind. An encounter of the “third kind” refers to actual contact.

In the semi-alien world of Matchmaker, we might draw parallels. A “first kind” encounter, a sighting, correlates with spotting someone’s profile. A “second kind” encounter could be considered as actually exchanging correspondence with the someone. And an encounter of a “third kind” relates to “contact” – a meeting in person – connection.

I’d like to think that most of us within this community are about establishing “connections”, moreso than we’re about “throwing trash”. I’d like to think that most of us think in terms of ‘renting’ our time spent with others, moreso than we think we ‘own’ them. “There’s only this, there’s only us.” Unfortunately, SHE-SAID and I have corresponded with almost 900 individuals in the past two months. We know too well that there are still an awful lot of folks out here who need to start developing more post-Neanderthal civil sensibilities.

When would be a good time to start? “No day but today!

Chanticleer #23

Chanticleer
I do not propose to write an ode to dejection, but to brag as lustily as chanticleer in the morning, standing on his roost, if only to wake my neighbors up. 

Henry David Thoreau

January 1, 2001

“Chanticleer Calls”, a twice-monthly newsletter for discriminating readers, thinkers, feelers, speakers, listeners, and cogitators.


First, an explanation for Chanticleer’s second extended absence of the year. He’s found a rather intoxicatingly addictive sandbox to scratch in that has consumed most of his preceding two months.

WHAT I’VE LEARNED

As we begin the year of HAL, I thought it would be worthwhile for me personally to recount a few of my “lessons learned” over the past 12 months. Your mileage may vary.

  • Season as you go with chili.
  • Don’t take your jeans right out of the dryer and tuck them under your chin to fold. Especially if they have those metal rivets.
  • “If you can’t name it, you can’t use it.” – Helen Harkness
  • I’m learning not to underestimate myself.
  • I’m trying to not should on myself. (from Bruce Kodish and Albert Ellis)
  • From the play, ART: “If I’m who I am because I’m who I am and you’re who you are because you are who you are, then I’m who I am and you’re who you are. If, on the other hand, I’m who I am because you’re who you are, and if you’re who you are because I’m who I am, then I’m not who I am and you’re not who you are.” – Yasmina Reza, translated by Christopher Hampton
  • “Never do too well that which you don’t want to do again.” – Steve McGonigle
  • I’ve learned that more than anything else, I’m about making things better and not being constrained by convention.
  • It’s more appropriate to talk in terms of MEANINGS (plural) than MEANING (singular).
  • You can’t talk about MEANINGS without first talking about ME.
  • MEANING is not conveyed so much as it is suggested, then interpreted.
  • After visiting old Jerusalem, sacred place for three major world religions, I learned that the central question of religion is: “Which story do you believe?”
  • How something is presented can be as important as what is presented.
  • Half a cup of coffee is less likely to go cold than a full cup.
  • I learned I couldn’t drive around St. Louis using my favorite 20-year-old road atlas.
  • Even though the atlas had helped me navigate all over the country and carried a lot of sentimental value … if the roads change, the map has to be updated.
  • C. R. Jung: “There is no coming to consciousness without pain.”
  • The Eagles: “Don’t let the sound of your own wheels drive you crazy.”
  • One test is worth a thousand expert opinions. – sign in a test center office in Huntsville, Alabama
  • It’s not about what you do for a living …. it’s about what you do for a life.
  • Wendell Johnson: “To a mouse, cheese is cheese. That is why mouse traps are effective.”
  • College students and young adults only qualify for Learner’s Permits when it comes to driving yourself crazy. Once you reach the mid-30s, most of us have earned a full Commercial License –not only are we fully qualified to drive ourselves crazy, but we’re competent to drive other people crazy.
  • Sometimes order and technique make a difference. When washing your car windshield, there’s a reason why you squeegey from the top down.
  • “We give people what we want.” – Helen Harkness (applies to a multitude of applications)
  • I learned that – generally – you use which when there’s a comma, and that when there’s not, which I didn’t know before.
  • Life can be considered an extended experiment, in that there is no failure in the lab – only results.
  • Keep company with those who make you better.
  • BAKE and BROIL may result in the ‘same’ oven temperature, but they produce entirely different results.
  • My rules fit in my wallet. A lot of people have rules that fill libraries.
  • In 1801 we couldn’t have the “When does life begin?” debate that we have now because we know so much more now than we did then. In 2201, we’ll undoubtedly know much more that we know now, so we can expect the debate to change as our knowledge and understanding change.
  • I learned that the Internet has become pervasive when I overheard two 60-something women discussing their multiple Yahoo and Excite email accounts in a Denny’s coffee shop in South Bend, Indiana.
  • We all make our own measures, and we each measure with a different yardstick.
  • Abraham Maslow: “Our real guilt is not living up to our potential.”
  • Barbara Winter: “Go in the direction of your dreams, not your fears.”
  • I learned that we teach kids to become crazy like we are when I interviewed a high school kid for a Career Day exercise. Half of his resume dealt with band and his musical accomplishments and passions, but he said he was going to college to study engineering because “my dad’s an engineer and that’s how I can best support a family.”
  • At some point in your life, you have to start creating your own wisdom.
  • As you grow older and have more life experiences, you begin to understand that “some of the life commandments you learned growing up just don’t work anymore.” – Robert Babb
  • Single is not a 4-letter word.
  • Ralph W. Emerson: “The voyage of the best ship is a zigzag line of a hundred tacks. See the line from a sufficient distance, and it straightens itself to the average tendency. Your genuine action will explain itself, and will explain your other genuine actions. Your conformity explains nothing.”
  • People don’t need expert opinions nearly as much as they need insightful listeners.
  • The presidential election was a good example of the notion that once you’re inside the margin of error, you’re entered “The Non-Sense Zone”. Be careful of the inherent fallacies that will befall you when you make the first cut with a chain saw, then attempt the second with a scalpel.
  • Einstein: “The problems that exist in the world cannot be solved by the level of thinking that created them.”
  • If it’s “too close to call” … DON’T!
  • A lot of people need to learn how to be less literal. A hammer can be used for more than driving nails.
  • Wisdom from a friend’s daddy: “I wish I could buy her for what she’s worth and sell her for what she thinks she’s worth.”
  • And I’ve learned that I miss my mother more now than when she died four years ago. Part of it is due to the fact that I’ve recently become very aware of how much of me is due to her. Part of it is that I really regret she can’t see how my daughter has grown and developed and will all-too-soon graduate from high school. And part of it is because I still carry her admonishment to me as an 8th-grader that I wasn’t making the most of my natural abilities and talents.

Here’s to all you’ve learned in 2000, and to the lessons we’ll learn together in 2001 – the year of HAL.


Chanticleer #22

Chanticleer
I do not propose to write an ode to dejection, but to brag as lustily as chanticleer in the morning, standing on his roost, if only to wake my neighbors up. 

Henry David Thoreau

November 8, 2000


“TOO CLOSE TO CALL”

A few “morning-after” (or “morning-during”?) observations:

While watching the election commentaries last night, I found it interesting how many talking heads would talk in terms of the presidential race being “too close to call” …. and then attempt to call it. I say if it’s “too close to call” … DON’T!

This morning I saw a tape of Bush campaign chairman Don Evans stating that, despite the re-count in Florida, he “hopes and believes” Bush will be the winner. Regardless of Mr. Evans’ sincere belief, however, I doubt his comment will affect the re-count. In the end, the electoral college results will derive from a counting of votes, not beliefs.

Speaking of counting … I’ve also heard reports that both campaigns have “dispatched” senior campaign officials to Florida to “monitor” the re-count. A bunch of funny images come to mind concerning the soberly dour Warren Christopher, Gore advisor and former Secretary of State for Jimmy Carter, standing over poor little Mary Sue Bodine of Backwater, Florida …. “21, 22, 33, 34, 45 …”. Does anybody know what skill sets are necessary to “monitor” a vote count?

Does anybody know what the margin of error is in the vote count? (I’m only half-joking.)


UPDATE: un nombre, Hombre?

In the previous Chanticleer Calls, I told you about the name-changing tactics of Tomas Eduardo Wesson, candidate for Dallas County Constable for Precinct 6 known previously as Thomas Edwin Wesson. Precinct 6 is, of course, predominantly Hispanic.

Mr. (sorry, I mean Señor) Wesson (Rep) lost to Mike Dupree (Dem) by a count of 19,616 to 6,176.

A rather decisive repudiation, one might infer. However … there were still over 6,000 voters who reacted positively to Mr. (sorry again, Señor) Wesson’s, uh, “message.” I wonder how many of those 6,000 votes came from conscientious, deliberate votes for Señor Wesson (see, I’m trainable), vs. how many came from straight Republican ticket voting, vs. how many came from Hispanic voters who played into his political nom de plume.

Recalling the words of H.L. Mencken … “No one ever went broke underestimating the intelligence of the American public.”


‘NSYNC, ‘NSCREAM!

At the risk of further embarrassing my daughter, I’ve put off confessing something that I feel I need to admit. And it’s partially her fault.

Last July, she and her cousins spent a few days visiting my brother and his wife in Phoenix. While they were gone, she asked me to record a live concert on HBO by the “boy band” heartthrobs ‘Nsync. As the dutiful dad, I did indeed. But I made the mistake of sitting down and actually watching the beginning of the concert.

And now I have to confess … My name is Steve. And I’m an ‘Nsync fan.

Big time.

I don’t know as if I can really explain why, but I suspect it has to do with the combination of their music, their choreography, the fact that their choreographer is only 18 years old, the “live-ness” of their concert, and the reactions of the thousands of girls attending the concert. Or I should say, the SCREAMS of those at the concert.

I won’t attempt to justify or analyze why I’ve worn out their mini-disc over the past three months driving to work, working out in the yard, traveling in airplanes, or writing Chanticleer Calls as I’m doing now. Certainly they derive a lot of their music, harmonies and dancing from the originally-pigmented Michael Jackson, with some homage to a rap influence, with extensive use of syncopation and sophomoric lyrics.

I’ll admit that I initially thought a lot of their ‘dancing’ – which includes myriad head bobs and weaves, hand flips and turns, arm chops and waves, etc. – was just plain silly. However, taking it all into the context of what they do and who they do it for … it works.

And I think I have to admit that I’m envious of their talent, their inhibition, and the reactions they evoke. One of the reactions they intentionally seek is … they specifically exhort their fans to SCREAM!.

I probably wouldn’t mention this except that a couple of months ago I found myself screaming – quite uncontrollably – while I rode the Texas Giant roller coaster at Six Flags Over Texas. (Coincidentally, I was at Six Flags only because Stacy invited me to attend the Hanson concert there with her and her friend Candice. After all, to Stacy, Hanson is still HANSON, and everybody else is – with due respect to Chevy Chase – not.)

When I got off (the roller coaster) I realized how exhilarating and therapeutic it felt to just let go and SCREAM!

So why not, every now and then, find something to SCREAM! about?


(UNPUBLISHED) LETTER TO THE EDITOR

Eagle-eyed Chanticleer reader MG called my attention to a couple of items on the Editorial page of the October 28th Dallas Morning News. That prompted this much-too-long-to-be-published letter, but it felt good to get it out of my fingertips.

As one who attempts to critically discriminate those differences that make a difference from those that don’t, I must mark a large E for Error on your Scorecard of October 28, 2000, re: Dancing on Graves. You advise to “close the doors immediately” on a disco that’s been built “just outside” the Auschwitz death camp in Poland. You profess, “It dishonors the memory of so many innocent people who died to make this area a site for fun and frolic.

Without knowing what distance constitutes “just outside,” I would ask a simple, practical question: How far away is far enough – five hundred feet? A thousand feet? (Do your editors feel there’s some kind of correlation here with the size of a buffer zone between a topless bar and a Northwest Highway neighborhood?) A mile? Ten miles? If you start down that slippery slope, you may soon be asking, “should there be ANY sites ‘for fun and frolic’ anywhere in the whole country of Poland?”

Two other articles in the same paper might bring some perspective to this issue.
You noted that an Israeli orchestra broke a long-standing cultural taboo by playing a piece of music by Richard Wagner. [SS: See Chanticleer Calls #15] Wagner, who died six years before Hitler was born, was said to be Hitler’s favorite composer, thus his music became symbolically linked to the Nazis. Can one appreciate Wagner’s music without embracing Nazi ideology or denigrating the memory of its victims? Apparently, after 55 years, Israeli musicians believe it’s time to say, “yes.”

In her commentary, Lee Cullum commented on the deteriorating situation in the Middle East, specifically in Old Jerusalem. Both Muslims and Jews (and let’s not forget the Christians) hold many sites within the walls of Jerusalem as “sacred” and “holy”. Clearly, as long as two warring groups cling to ancient beliefs that the same plot of land is “holy” to each, and as long as individuals within these groups cling to the ancient belief that it is “holy” to die for a “holy” cause, we should expect the violence to continue. After all, if one truly “believes”, then one behaves in accordance with that belief. Beliefs lead to behavior. Until groups, and specifically the individuals within those groups, are willing to update their ancient beliefs, their ancient behaviors will continue.

I visited Jerusalem last June, accompanied by an elder guide appropriately named Ezekiel. Ezekiel took care several times to tell me that Old Jerusalem has been destroyed sixteen times, and rebuilt seventeen times. So he cautioned that I should exercise just a bit of skepticism as I paused before the ‘traditional’ “holy” places. These, he explained, represented the places where “tradition holds” that certain events happened.

And so we have – and will continue to have – “holy” Jewish people killing “holy” Palestinian people, and “holy” Palestinian people killing “holy” Jewish people over “holy” land, and “holy” temples, and “holy” walls, according to traditionally-held “holy” beliefs.

I’m suggesting that we might all benefit if your editorial writers, and we readers, and the Poles and the Jews and the Palestinians, recognized that words such as dishonor and holy apply to ideas and notions conceived and perpetuated by humans – not as attributes or qualities ’embedded in the land, and walls, and temples, and discos.’

If it’s so easy for most of us to recognize that “beauty is in the eye of the beholder”, why is it so difficult to likewise ‘get’ that “holy is in the eye of the beholder”? Until we, and they, ‘get’ this, Jewish and Palestinian and Polish and American eyes will continue to be violently taken, one for another. Ancient beliefs lead to ancient behavior.


AND FINALLY – Economy Class Syndrome

Equally-eagle-eyed reader JC from Dallas forwarded this Reuters’ report from Yahoo News.

LONDON (Reuters)  A bride-to-be collapsed and died from a condition known as “economy class syndrome” just minutes after getting off a flight from Australia to London, British newspapers reported on Monday.

Emma Christofferson, 28, developed deep vein thrombosis (DVT), a blood clot associated with long distance flights, while traveling home to London from the Olympic Games (news – web sites) on a Qantas flight via Singapore.

The Marks & Spencer sales assistant complained of feeling unwell on the last part of the 12,000-mile (19,310 km) trip and collapsed in the arrival hall at Heathrow airport. She died 10 days ago, before reaching hospital.

The condition is frequently caused by long periods spent in cramped conditions. Tightly packed seating — such as that found in the economy class section of airliners — can restrict movement and trigger the blood clot illness.

A post mortem confirmed the cause of death as DVT, in which a blood clot in the leg works its way into the heart or lungs. Sudden death is a likely outcome.

A spokeswoman for Qantas was quoted as saying: “The safety of our passengers is always of paramount importance and we refer to the possible effects of flying in our in-flight magazine.”

It advises passengers to move their legs and feet for three or four minutes per hour to improve circulation.


READERS REACT

Speaking of … zero-tolerance policy, did you happen to see the episode of that tv show “Judging Amy” in which this very topic was treated? There was an African American high school boy who was arrested for possession of a gun at school. John came from a divorced home, and his single mom often had a hard time coping with her two kids and her lot in general. Thus, John had to be responsible early in life. John was an excellent student and athlete. His coach had promised to act as a confidant for him, a trusted adult figure. Coach told John he could talk to him about any worries or concerns in total confidentiality.

As it turns out, it was the result of John’s confiding to Coach the reason he had the gun at school that John was arrested: Coach reported John to the principal who immediately called the police. No one bothered to ask John why he had the gun. After all, zero-tolerance means zero-tolerance. Period. No questions asked. No exceptions.

Of course, once in the hearing, the school’s attorney argued the value and importance of maintaining zero-tolerance and cited facts and statistics similar to those that must be mentioned in the … DMN article. Amy is painted as an open-minded, thinking judge. True to her character, she asked John to tell his entire story; no one had asked up to this point. He said that the night before, his mother had been at her wits end; she may have been drinking; and she was extremely despondent, upset, and depressed. John knew the gun was in the house and was scared she might do something to herself or to him or to his brother with the gun, so he took it out of her drawer and brought it to school in order to protect his family. He put it in his locker. He confided this upsetting situation to Coach, looking for advice, perhaps, and help. That is when Coach turned him in. “….but Coach promised I could trust his confidentiality…” When asked why he did not take the gun directly to the police station, he relied, “An African American walking into a police station with a gun would never leave.” (or something like that) – in Dallas

Chanticleer #21

Chanticleer
I do not propose to write an ode to dejection, but to brag as lustily as chanticleer in the morning, standing on his roost, if only to wake my neighbors up. 

Henry David Thoreau

October 22, 2000


Idiot, Idiot, Who’s the Idiot?

What do you make of this Letter to the Editor, printed in the Dallas Morning News (DMN) October 6, 2000?

Prank is idiocy

On the night of Sept. 27, while driving through a large apartment complex parking lot, I drove past a vehicle which appeared to have a human body stuffed into the trunk, with limbs dangling from the car. Horrified, I called 911 and informed the authorities. The police were dispatched and subsequently informed that a resident of the apartment complex had placed a lifelike human-sized doll in the trunk as a “prank” and that he did this every year.

I would really like to know what kind of sick individual would find any humor in simulating a grotesque murder. We, as citizens of Dallas, simply should not and cannot tolerate this idiocy.

This “prank” clearly represents a profound disrespect for human life, not to mention a complete disregard for effective law enforcement. Morons like this prankster waste valuable police time and energy, impairing their ability to fight crime.

I sincerely hope this prankster is discovered and punished harshly; he or she should reimburse the police force for the time wasted on investigating this case. Better yet, he or she should be compelled to spend time with a support group comprised of victims of violent crime. Perhaps then he or she may realize that an act of violent death is not something we should simulate, much less tolerate.

JF, Dallas


What’s in an un nombre, Hombre?

Mr. Thomas Edwin Wesson, 42, ran unsuccessfully for the Dallas City Council in 1997 and 1999. In 1998, he filed paperwork to run for Precinct 6 justice of the peace, but failed to pay the permit fee and his name was dropped from consideration.

Undaunted, Mr. Wesson is on the 2000 ballot for the November 7th election, running as the Republican candidate for Dallas County Constable, Precinct 6. He’s on the ballot as Tomas Eduardo Wesson. Precinct 6 is, according to the DMN, predominantly Hispanic.

The paper reports that Mr. Wes – I mean, Señor Wesson – has confirmed he is not of Hispanic heritage, but insists, “That is my name. That’s how I spell ‘Thomas’.”

According to a Dallas County Republican party official, “If you pay your filing fee, you can file as Abraham Lincoln, and I can’t stop it.

So I’m thinking … in Dallas County … Republican Party … heck, why not “Smith A. Wesson”?

The “A”, of course, would stand for “And.”


Cheerleader Update

In the last edition of Chanticleer Calls I related the plight of the Colleyville Heritage High School cheerleaders. This week, state district judge Dana Womack ruled that her court doesn’t have jurisdiction over the case. She instructed attorneys representing the parents of the girls and the school district to work out their differences.

The paper reported that, “Mediation was considered but ultimately rejected by a unamimous vote of the school board last month.”

The parents’ attorneys will appeal the judge’s decision, which may take up to six months.

I guess there are some rules that just aren’t negotiable, or compromise-able, or mediation-able. The only lesson for the girls to learn here is: Follow the damn rules!


More Rules, More Spirit?

The Solheim Cup represents a golf competition between American women golfers and European women golfers. If you’re familiar with the Ryder Cup, think women instead of men and you’ve more or less got the Solheim Cup.

This year, the Europeans pulled an upset and beat the Americans, but a rules dispute left a sour taste in the mouths of the participants. In one of the key matches, the Swedish golfer Annika Sorenstam chipped in for a birdie on the 13th hole.

However, the Americans playing against Sorenstam, Pat Hurst and Kelly Robbins, protested that when Annika made her chip she wasn’t “away”, meaning she wasn’t the farthest from the cup. In golf etiquette, and rules, you play in order of who’s farthest from the hole. The Americans made her attempt the chip shot again, which she missed. Pat Hurst then made a short birdie putt to win the hole, and ultimately the match.

After the match, the Europeans were upset and referred to the Americans as “bad sports”. Sorenstam tearfully said, “It is sad to see that the ugly part of them came out because both Pat and Kelly are the nicest they have. It is just sad to see that – that they don’t even have sportsmanship.”

For her part, American Kelly Robbins apologized, saying, “Our goal was to make this a first-class event in the sense that we would show the men how to do it. Personally, I don’t think it turned out that way.”

U.S. captain Pat Bradley took responsibility for the protest, that it was her call to insist that Sorenstam replay the shot. She stated: “We played within the rules of the game. When the rules of the game are upheld, the spirit of the game is upheld.”


Ban ’em, Dano!

From the October 10, 2000 DMN:

LAWRENCE, Kan. – Critics of Wizard of Oz creator L. Frank Baum say a proposed Oz theme park would be inappropriate because the author was a racist who called for the “total annihilation” of native Americans.

In editorials written in the early 1890s, a decade before the first of his Oz books appeared, Mr. Baum called for the extermination of American Indians.

“Having wronged them for centuries we had better, in order to protect our civilization, follow it up by one more wrong and wipe these untamed and untameable creatures from the face of the earth,” he wrote in 1891 while publisher of The Aberdeen Saturday Pioneer in South Dakota. The editorial appeared shortly after the massacre at Wounded Knee.

Jimmie Oyler, the self-described chief of the United Tribe of Shawnee Indians, says it would be wrong to build the projected 6,000-acre park on land that used to belong to his tribe.

“If it has anything to do with Baum … it’s never going to be on Shawnee land,” Mr. Oyler said.

Kristin McCallum, a spokeswoman for Oz Entertainment Co., which plans to build the park near Kansas City for an estimated $860 million, called the 110-year-old editorial irrelevant. “I don’t see the relation,” she said.


From the May 22, 2000 edition of US News and World Report, with thanks to reader PC for bringing it to my attention.

An outing is no picnic

What is spring without new politically correct adventures?

The scheduling of a picnic to honor Baseball Hall of Famer Jackie Robinson led to a furor over alleged racism at the State University of New York-Albany. Some 40 students at the university insisted that the word “picnic” originally referred to the racial lynchings of blacks.

They were wrong. Picnic comes from a 17th-century French word for a social gathering in which each person brings a different food. But in reply to the 40 protesters, affirmative action director Zaheer Mustafa put out a memo asking all student leaders to refrain from any use of the word picnic. “Whether the claims are true or not, the point is the word offended,” he said.

In publicity for the event honoring Robinson, the word picnic was changed to “outing.” This offended gay students, so the event formally known as picnic was publicized without a noun describing what was going on.

“Every day we come up with a new word we can’t use,” said exasperated student editor Richard Ryback. – John Leo


The Tourist Tater

From the pages of the South Bend (Indiana) Tribune:
“The Tourist Tater, a 6-foot-high Mr. Potato Head sculpture, is seen Friday outside the Warwick (R.I.) City Hall. The sculpture, painted a dark brown to appear suntanned and wearing an ill-fitting Hawaiian shirt, is to be removed following complaints that it is racist. State officials insist no offense was meant.”

Miami Herald columnist Leonard Pitts weighed in with an opinion piece against the potato, concluding with “You would hope that someday we might reach a point where a white person would instinctively understand beforehand why a tanned tuber might give offense – or a black person might not instinctively take offense. As it is now, you say “potato,” and I say regrettable reminder of blackface bigotry.”


WARNING: You might find the following photo offensive and appalling

Please do not look below this line unless you accept responsibility for your own blood pressure, breathing and general emotional sensitivities! STOP!



The photo I’m warning you about was banned from a t-shirt printed by the Junior Class (2002) at Saint Mary’s College (SMC), just across the road from Notre Dame (ND) in South Bend, IN.

Here is what some students said in The Observer, the jointly-published student paper of both schools.

I am appalled by the shirt and work desparately hard to maintain good relations across the street. This represents everyone on this Board and I have gotten numerous phone calls about it.

This brings us backwards from where we were going.

When you put the “ND” on the shirt, that was a direct attack.

I can see how it’s ‘cute,’ but one thing can start the whole ball rolling. I do see it snowballing.

How can we make certain judgments like that about ND women?

A really good friend of mine goes to Notre Dame and if she wore the shirt and the situation were reversed, I’d be really hurt.

I think the shirt says that Notre Dame men hold control of women to choose. To me that shirt is sexist. We need to confiscate and prevent any distribution of them.

The t-shirt not only perpetuated of Notre Dame and Saint Mary’s women alike, it also trivialized the women who made the choice to come to Saint Mary’s. …

The t-shirt portrays the Saint Mary’s women not as being chosen for their mind or as a whole person, but rather as a sexual object by the Notre Dame man.

The shirt displays disrespect for ourselves as women.

Now that you’ve been properly warned, here is my attempt to re-create the offensive as best I can, within the limits of my editing skills.

St. Mary's Class of 2002 Tshirt

The background for this dispute, as I learned about it, is that Saint Mary’s (SMC) is, and always has been, a women’s school. Until a few decades ago, Notre Dame was a men’s school. Now it’s coed.

The recognized stereotype – not necessarily borne out by facts – that has developed is that women go to Notre Dame to get an education, and are not particularly attractive or interested in men.

Conversely, the women who attend SMC are generally more attractive and are there to land a Notre Dame man.

This otherwise innocently-appearing photo thus became an object of vociferous, politically-correct scorn by women from both schools.

The SMC women object because they believe it plays into their negative stereotype as being serious only about men, not about Mensa.

The ND women object because it plays into their negative stereotype as being serious about Mensa, and not about men.

Menwhile … I mean, “meanwhile” … the men of Notre Dame seem silent on the issue. On one hand this makes conventional sense, in line with the old wisdom that you don’t step into a cat fight unless one of them’s yours. On the other hand, it seems to me there’s a case to be made that this whole dispute objectifies and denigrates men.

I mean, the women of SMC seem to believe that just by purring across the road they can win the affections of the ND men. And the ND women seem to be scratching out some kind of territorial boundary that marks the ND men as ‘theirs’.

Meow!

(Scroll down to a scan of the actual article.)


READERS REACT

What an interesting, thought-provoking chanticleer! First of all, your passage about the Colleyville cheerleaders and the HPHS party. . .This has become such a convoluted issue. Does it have to be? So many different parties feel they have the responsibility to take care of these situations. In my opinion, there seems to be a confusion of societal roles at play. [How do you suppose similar incidents would have been handled 20 years ago? 50 years ago? etc.] Some folks feel that any kind of ‘punishment’ of kids is solely in the parents’ domain, none of the schools’ business. On the other hand, certain parties feel many parents are not taking an active enough role in their children’s lives, so lest such acts go ‘unpunished,’ the schools had better handle it. Some folks waffle in-between…One thing I particularly love about your newsletter is your observations of the world around you and your subsequent musings about them. While experiencing the business of my life, I, myself, like to think along such ‘lines’. For example, I quite enjoyed the examination of the meaning of ‘hug’. One tends to assume that the bundle of connotations around the word are warm and fuzzy, but context is key…… Really liked that one. … Cocorico! – in Dallas

I’m probably attributing *way* too much insight to the TXDOT, but there might have been a rationale to the one-lane striping. Seems like that’s been striped as one lane for years now, *but* here goes: by striping it as one lane, the inevitable bottleneck will tend to be pushed back onto Woodall Rogers; the backup won’t be *safe* there, but it might be *safer* than it would be on Central, particularly during construction. I’ll have to think about that some more … I’m always fascinated by traffic patterns and how they’re controlled. Traffic is an enormous organic system that has real-time controls built into it … it’s got to be one of the most fascinating things to control. – in Dallas

Your comments on hugging were thought provoking. Hugging people that are in pain, or greetings expressed this way when one has not seen another for a long time do seem appropriate. The pastor of our church stands at the back and gives hugs every Sunday after church. Although he is very sincere and caring, others find the hugs uncomfortable. One person expressed that it is done so repetitively that it has become less than geniuine. Several congregants even go another direction just to avoid it. I guess I am a cold fish, but I’d just soon have a hearty handshake or a big smile. – in Smalltown, TX

St. Mary's Class of 2002 T-Shirt

Chanticleer #20

Chanticleer
I do not propose to write an ode to dejection, but to brag as lustily as chanticleer in the morning, standing on his roost, if only to wake my neighbors up. 

Henry David Thoreau

October 8, 2000


Restriping North Central

From the Sep 17th Dallas Morning News (DMN) … The Texas Department of Transportation (TxDOT) announced a restriping project that will add an additional exit lane from north-bound Woodall Rogers freeway to north-bound North Central Expressway on the west side of downtown Dallas. As I take this exit every day to my current place of employment, this is good news on a personal level. During rush hours, the line of cars waiting to exit creates an unsafe backup onto the Woodall Rogers freeway.

Terry Sams, director of operations for the local TxDOT office: “We realized it would work much better if we got two lanes back.” Carol Walters, senior research engineer for the Texas Transportation Institute: “There’s way too much traffic for one lane… We love getting the chance to look at these problems and seeing what can be done with existing pavement.”

The project, which includes restriping about one mile of lanes and changing the exit signage, will take about six weeks, at a cost of $134,000.

At the risk of looking a “gift lane” in the mouth, as it were … I feel it worth noting that the reconstructed widening of North Central Expressway only opened within the past year. The exit from Woodall Rogers to North Central was constructed for two lanes, but – for some reason – was striped for only one during initial construction. The article noted that the restriping project was delayed for a year “partly because the project had to compete for vital road maintenance funds”. But that still begs the question … given that the initial construction allowed enough room for two lanes, why didn’t the initial striping and signage? I mean, we’re only talking about a stretch of the most heavily trafficked area around downtown Dallas. Was there not an opportunity to save $134K by incorporating the two lanes in the initial striping and signage costs?


Rah-Rah, Sis-Boom Beer

At the risk of inflaming parental passions, I would like to comment on two local incidents regarding high schoolers, beer, parents and authorities. Interestingly, both schools represent (arguably) the most affluent districts in Tarrant and Dallas counties. One wonders (okay, I wonder) if such ‘news’ would emanate from more pedestrian locales.

As always (usually), I’m limited to the information that has been made public via the news outlets.

Last summer, the cheerleaders from Colleyville Heritage High School (in Tarrant county) attended a local cheerleading camp. To celebrate its completion, the girls and their parents scheduled a dinner party at a local hotel. Sometime prior to the dinner, some of the girls (about half of the twenty or so members of the squad) got together and drank some beer. (Zima, I’ve heard, if that makes a difference.) One of the parents or sponsors noticed some out-of-the-normal behavior from one of the girls, pulled her aside and questioned her. The girl admitted that some of the girls drank some beer, and all of the girls involved eventually admitted their involvement.

Clearly, this constituted an infraction of a pledge each of the girls had to sign as a condition of their participation on the cheerleading squad. This pledge dictated a punishment for such an infraction of three weeks suspension from all extracurricular activities, plus drug/alcohol abuse counseling. The girls, and their parents, anticipated this punishment.

However, the assistant principal, and eventually the principal, interpreted that this infraction also violated a Texas state education prohibition regarding alcohol use at any “school sponsored or related” activity. The state education committee policy mandates a six-week suspension from extracurricular activities, PLUS a six-week reassignment to the district’s “alternative school” – typically reserved for students with fairly severe disciplinary problems. And that’s the punishment the Colleyville Heritage High School administration meted out to these girls for drinking a beer. Oh … and they were kicked off the cheerleading squad.

The girls’ parents have retained attorneys and, last I heard, were preparing lawsuits.

Moving east about twenty miles to exclusive Highland Park High School in Dallas … A few weeks ago, police were called to a private residence in Highland Park after reports of underage drinking and rowdy behavior. As police cars pulled up to the residence, the high school partiers, numbering about 40 as I recall, reportedly either scattered or retreated into the house and called their parents on their cell phones. The news reports reported that most of the parents responded by either instructing their children to NOT take breathalyzer tests and cooperate with the police, or, in some cases, they assisted the children in eluding the police.

The kids who were caught, including some athletes and others involved in extracurricular activities, were to be punished in accordance with the three weeks suspension from their extracurricular activities. So far as I know, none of the parents was subject to any punishment.

Some of my reactions: More than anything having to do with alcohol, perhaps the gravest offense committed by the Colleyville cheerleaders was to not live up to the expectations of their parents – and specifically the school authorities – as “role models”, or “symbols” representing the “best” of what the school and community “stand for”.

Yes, they did sign a “pledge” not to engage in behavior that included drinking. They screwed up. They let themselves, their parents, and the school authorities down. They committed two offenses – they drank beer, and they failed to act as proper “symbols” of the school. However, it seems arguable to me whether the punishment fits the deed here.

It seems to me that, especially when non-parental authorities are handing out punishment to kids, there ought to be balanced considerations: are the consequences of the act commensurate with the consequences of the punishment? Realistically, what are the consequences on a 17- or 18-year old high school girl having a beer with a group of other girls at a hotel a few hours before having dinner with their parents? Realistically, what are the consequences of a high school honors student having to drop her curriculum for six weeks while attending alternative school for “disciplinary problems”, the corresponding impact on her college applications, and the memories she will carry into adulthood of her senior year in high school?

It seems to me that special considerations ought to be made in situations in which adults pass judgment and assess punishment on kids for behavior that is perfectly acceptable for the adults. (the Cider House Rules come to mind) Sure, it’s easy enough to assume the moral high ground and counter my comments with indignant outrage about drug and alcohol abuse and how beer and cigarettes lead to marijuana and cocaine and heroin and life on the street as an AIDS-infected addict. And how “ZERO TOLERANCE” is the only message that kids ought to hear.

But from a practical perspective, these kids (and all high school seniors, including my daughter) are just months away from being away from home, and away from most of the controls they’ve grown up under. And they’re just three years from formal and legal “adulthood” and all the behaviors that distinction affords. Where, and when, and from whom, are they supposed to learn about responsible use (vs. abuse) of alcohol? Are we leaving that to the Anheuser-Busch, Miller and Coors public service announcements? I suggest that with respect to rules, kids learn as much from observing the way their parents and other adults react to their breaking the rules, as from the rules themselves. What will the Highland Park kids ‘learn’ from their parents? What will the Colleyville cheerleaders ‘learn’ from the principles of their principals?


What’s a Hug Mean? Same word, same meaning?

A few weeks ago at the Cedar Rapids (IA) airport I observed two ‘hug.’ The first occurred to my left in the concourse area near the departure/arrival gate. A young woman I assumed of college age embraced a man in his fifties in a prolonged hug, with the man repeatedly patting the young woman on the back in a reassuring way. As they broke for just a few seconds, I could see that she was crying. Then they embraced again, with her head turned against his chest, her arms clutched around his shoulders tightly. I wondered about the story behind this hug.

A few minutes later, the flight from Dallas arrived. A mother with two young boys emerged from the airplane into the waiting arms of her mother and sister. As they turned to walk toward the baggage claim area, the aunt reached down to give the older boy – about ten or eleven – another big hug. The boy allowed her the embrace, loosely placing his arms around her waist and turning his head toward me with a look that all but said, “Auntie, PLEASE! Not here!”

This hug clearly did not ‘mean’ what that hug ‘meant.’


Rain

Fortunately, there are some things that are absolutely, unequivocally unambiguous. Like, for instance, whether it rains or not. It either rains, or it doesn’t. And unfortunately for the North Texas area, beginning in mid-June we experienced a rainless drought that approached three months duration. Until, that is, September 12 when a thunderstorm broke the rainless streak.

Or did it?

The front page of the September 13th DMN displayed a five-column photo of lightning, clouds and rain over downtown Dallas. The headline said it all:

FINALLY, RAIN!*
*But officially, dry spell goes on as storms skip D/FW gauge

Well, I guess the headline didn’t quite say it all. Seems the storm bypassed D/FW airport where the ‘official’ rain gauge sits. So ‘officially,’ the drought continued.

Oh, come on, you say – make it simple! Did it rain, or did it not rain?

Like so many things we wish were otherwise, the most appropriate answer is, “It depends.


AND FINALLY – Lines

Police in South Bend, Indiana, had to physically restrain and arrest a 74-year old man after he created a disturbance with his neighbor over a flagpole the neighbor had erected on their joint property line. The dispute has been going on for six years.

Violence has again found an excuse in old Jerusalem. As September ended, and as the Hebrew holy days approached, “right wing” Israeli leader Ariel Sharon visited the Israeli-controlled Temple Mount, a sacred and holy place for both Jews and Muslims. As reported by the Associated Press, the motivation for Sharon’s visit was to “demonstrate that Israel is in control” of the area, a contentious point of Middle East peace negotiations. Stated Sharon, “The state of Israel cannot afford that an Israeli citizen will not be able to visit part of his country, not to speak about the holiest place for the Jewish people all around the world.”

Youssef Barakat, a 47-year old Muslim stained in blood from the rioting after Sharon’s visit, stated, “We will give our souls and our everything to protect this mosque. To die for this would be heaven for us. If they keep trying to do these things, it will be a revolution everywhere in the Middle East.”. Battle lines seem clearly drawn around the Mount, the West bank of the Jordan River, and the Gaza Strip, with more than 80 people killed so far.

It’s going to cost $134,000 and six weeks of labor to re-paint the lines on North Central Expressway.

The cheerleaders at Colleyville Heritage High School and the kids at Highland Park High School crossed the lines of behavior, and expectations, that had been drawn by their parents and school authorities.

The two scenes at the Cedar Rapids airport blur the lines that define what one “hug” is and means, versus another.

Because we make distinctions such as official, we create lines where they do, or do not, rain.

I suggest that we become more conscious of some of these lines we draw, particularly those that serve as metaphorical “lines in the sand” that determine:

  • what we do, or don’t, tolerate;
  • what we will, or will not, compromise on;
  • what we can, or can’t, control;
  • what we will fight, or will not fight, to defend.

And I suggest that we also consider how many of these lines are arbitrary, and many times demarcate that which otherwise would remain fuzzily – yet naturally – undivided.

Chanticleer #19

Chanticleer
I do not propose to write an ode to dejection, but to brag as lustily as chanticleer in the morning, standing on his roost, if only to wake my neighbors up. 

Henry David Thoreau

August 27, 2000

Those of you astute readers with a sense of the monthly calendar realize that you’ve flipped pages twice now since Chanticleer last crowed your way. He has no valid reason for the unplanned hiatus so he will offer no excuses. However, he would like to relate a few experiences experienced and thoughts thought from the past two months.


Israel

I spent a week in Israel back in June on a business trip. This was my first trip to the Middle East so I played tourist as much as time would allow. The highlight for me was a day-trip from Tel Aviv (on the Mediterranean) to Jerusalem (about an hour inland) on June 26th. Some observations: San Francisco has nothing on Jerusalem as far as hills go. Jerusalem has over 600,000 people now, and building seems to be going on all around it. Traffic was horrible. The weather was dry and hot, probably mid-90s, with high desert very similar to Tucson or eastern Colorado Springs.

An unexpected highlight for me was spending a couple of hours at Yad Vashem, the Holocaust Memorial. The other person on my semi-private tour, a 74-year old Jew from the U.K. named David Colton, particularly wanted to visit it. (Funny that I’ve never really thought about there being Jews in England.) I didn’t object, so our 75-year old van-driver-local historian-Tevye-sound-alike-tour-guide named Ezekiel made a detour prior to entering the old city and took us to Yad Vashem.

Of the six million Jews murdered during the Holocaust, they estimate that 1.5 million were children under the age of 17. A special memorial building pays tribute to these children in a most powerful way. After walking down a somber, darkened, winding walk amidst recordings of children playing and singing, you face a large black-and-white montage of perhaps a dozen children, their names and ages printed on the photos. A recording relates some chilling facts regarding Nazi acts against children. From the montage, you continue around and down into darkness before you enter a space in which you’re surrounded on all sides, above and below by flickering candles. Using some number of actual candles and hundreds, if not thousands of mirrors, the effect is that you’re in the midst of 1.5 million candles – with each flickering light reflecting the symbolic remembrance of an exterminated child.

We had to wait to enter the Hall of Remembrance because we were told a special ceremony was going on. A few minutes later the doors opened and a quite important looking group of people somberly filed out, including several military officials, a camera man and sound man. They set up a quick interview/sound bite session just outside the door, and I overheard a woman reporter asking a distinguished looking gentleman a couple of questions, and I heard bits and pieces of what sounded like very sober, diplomatic responses.

The next morning, June 27th, I read in the Jerusalem Post that the man was David Trimble, First Minister of Northern Ireland. A large photo showed him, aided by one of the uniformed military officials, laying a wreath inside the Hall of Remembrance. The article noted that Mr. Trimble was in the Middle East “to discuss the successes of the Northern Ireland peace process.”

Back home in Dallas on July 3rd, the Dallas Morning News (AP) reported on the build-up of tensions in Northern Ireland as the week approached for the annual Orange Order marches of Protestants through predominantly Catholic neighborhoods. Throughout that following week I read almost daily reports of violence and threats resulting from this annual, “traditional” protest.

I’m struggling with the symbolic relevance of a Northern Ireland politician paying respects at a Jewish memorial for atrocities committed largely by Christians, while the Protestants and Catholics in his country continue to hate and kill each other.

I think it’s important for those of us coming from a Christian-centric culture to do a little historical homework before traveling/pilgrimmaging to “the Holy Land”. While we of course associate Israel, Jerusalem, Bethlehem, etc., as the region “where Jesus walked”, one should realize that Jerusalem is recognized as a “holy” city by three major religions – Christianity, Judaism, and Islam. Inside the walled city, the historical “Old City”, there are four sectors or quarters – the Muslim, Christian, Jewish and Armenian.
Personally, I felt a bit uncomfortable, if not embarrassed, seeing a busload of American tourists walking past the Wailing Wall in matching JESUS IS THE ONLY WAY t-shirts and JESUS SAVES! gimme caps. Imagine if they encountered a similar group of Moslem tourists, or Orthodox Jews, displaying similarly parochial sensitivities.

Ezekiel proudly informed us, as we unloaded to walk through the Garden of Gethsemane, just below the eastern wall and just down the hill from the Mount of Olives, that “experts have verified” some of the olive trees in the Garden to be at least 2,000 years old. And I thought … can you just imagine the tourism authorities listening to their consultant if he had reported: “We can say with confidence that our analysis concludes that the oldest tree is approximately 1,600 years old, possibly as old as 1,800 years.”

I don’t think so.

Ezekiel also mentioned on several occasions that the Old City of Jerusalem has been destroyed 16 times, and re-built 17 times. Therefore, some of the claims of “this is where that happened” ought to be taken with some skepticism. However, while I stood in the Garden of Gethsemane, below the Mount of Olives, I figured there probably wasn’t much doubt as to the historical legitimacy of that particular place. I looked across the way, up towards the walled city that housed some of the most holy of places for the three great religions most responsible for much (if not most) of the divisiveness in the world today. And standing there in Gethsemane, I thought, “Your gods are too small for me.”


Seen and Heard

A poster advertissment at Gatwick Airport in London for a high-speed Internet service: Click Ass!

Another poster advertissment at Gatwick … a huge photograph of a nicely-shaped woman wearing a tennis skirt and prominently protruding sports bra, running across the court with racket in hand. The caption read: Only the ball should bounce.

During a business trip to Cedar Rapids, Iowa, I ate dinner by myself at a local restaurant, and received very attentive service from a young female Cedar Rapidian. Returning a few minutes after serving my meal, she politely and professionally asked me in that distinctive flat-vowel Midwest accent, “So how’s that tastin’ for yah there?” (Okay, so try saying it out loud and think “Fargo”, the movie.)

I rode in a British Airways seat for 11 hours from London to DFW behind a guy wearing a hat with stitching across the back that read: TERRY: Tool-Pusher.

In perusing some online ‘matchmaking’ advertisements (although by now I kind of prefer advertissments), I found one particularly interesting. This very articulate woman commented that she was of European heritage, and further explained that most of her “descendants had come from Whales.” I felt obligated to express to her some skepticism as to the accuracy of that claim, since I had carefully inspected her photographs and seen no evidence of blow holes. (Upon further review, I wish I had thought to mention my recent visit to Jerusalem and the Whaling Wall …)

The morning after Gore’s speech at the Democratic National Convention, the Dallas Morning News headline quoted his speech in their front page headline: “I will never let you down”. My first reaction: this exhilarating exhortation of lasting lemming leadership unfortunately reflects a steady regression of lowering idealism among the Dems …

FDR: “the New Deal”
Truman: “the buck stops here”
JFK: “ask not what your country can do for you”
LBJ: “the Great Society”
Jimmy Carter: “the great malaise” (and don’t forget Billy Beer!)
Willie Clinton: “I did not have sexual relations with .. that woman”
Al Gore: “I will never let you down.”

In the interest of equal time, fair play, and equal disgust, I call your attention to a report during the GOP convention that the Bush campaign refuted a Washington Post report that George Dubya had “cut a deal with conservatives to preserve existing anti-abortion language in return for a softer stance on issues such as education, women’s health and immigration.”

Ah, moral leadership at its finest and most mushily compromising concerning one of the few governmental issues that truly affects individual lives.

In case you missed it, they finally lowered the Confederate flag that had flown over the South Carolina Statehouse in July, as discussed in previous Chanticleer Calls.

I’m pleased and honored to report that I’ve been invited to present a program at Notre Dame on September 29th, hosted by the university’s Language Resource Center.


Condoms To Go

Some of you have seen this already, but in case you haven’t … furthering the reminder that meaning is a function of context … context determines meaning …

Driving up North Central Expressway in July, I noticed a large sign just north of Walnut Hill advertising the, uh, ’boutique’ shop – Condoms To Go.

I wasn’t shocked, but I became instantly curious as to why the name specified “To Go.”

Of course, after a couple of seconds it dawned on me that the owner(s) probably decided to call it Condoms To Go as an efficiency measure. This way, by having the name of the establishment include the words to go, the clerks won’t have to waste any time asking consumers, “Is that for here or to go?” Since the name of the store says to go, customers should obviously know that they’re supposed to buy their desired product(s) and then, you know … go.

So I wouldn’t expect to hear the question, “Is that for here or to go?” inside the Condoms To Go store. And I got to thinking about other common consumer questions and phrases that I would NOT expect to hear inside a shop like Condoms To Go:

  • “Want fries with that?”
  • “You can super size it for just 39 cents more.”
  • “Buy now, pay later.”
  • “We can hold it for up to 90 days. But you’ll have to make a deposit.”
  • “Like new”
  • “We service all makes.”
  • “Professional installation available”
  • “Operators are standing by!”

You can read the complete list here.


AND FINALLY – The Little League World Series

The team from Houston Bellaire lost to the team representing Venezuela yesterday 3-2 in the final game of the Little League World Series.

As reported in the DMN, the coach of the victorious Venezuelan team praised the Houston team as “very aggressive warriors.

The writer of the story reported that, “Despite the loss, the city plans a parade …

Twelve-year-olds as very aggressive warriors?

Despite the loss?

What behaviors and attitudes does this type of language reflect … and what does it perpetuate?

Chanticleer #18

Chanticleer
I do not propose to write an ode to dejection, but to brag as lustily as chanticleer in the morning, standing on his roost, if only to wake my neighbors up. 

Henry David Thoreau

June 18, 2000


Learning and Knowing is NOT Doing

As an athlete growing up, I ‘learned’ the importance of warming-up and stretching (not to even mention “staying in shape”). I ‘know’ that, especially as one’s calendar collection grows, one has to take even greater care to make sure that one adequately warms-up and stretches before engaging in any kind of exercise.

I learned that. I know that.

Monday night a friend called and pleaded with me to play on her co-ed softball team to preclude them from having to forfeit a tournament game. I somewhat reluctantly, somewhat expectantly, agreed. Cutting to the chase …. (or should I say, pulling to the chase?) … I didn’t warm-up, I didn’t stretch. My first at-bat I hit a meek grounder to third. I dug for first, my 26-year-old mind screaming, “Beat it out! Beat it out!”

Halfway to first base, however (or was I still in the batter’s box?), my 46-year-old right hamstring responded, “I don’t think so … DANGER, WILL ROBINSON! DANGER!”. It pulled, popped, strained, sprained, or whatever the technical term is and almost made me fall face first in a humiliated pile.

Six days later I have a purple bruise occupying the back of my right leg from the top of my knee to just below where the sun don’t shine that’s bad enough to induce my daughter to emit an eye-covering, “Ewwwww!!!”

Is anybody getting the irony of this, coming on the Achilles heel of Chanticleer’s last issue relating her (my daughter’s) lack of foresight in getting herself sunburned?

So what do you ‘know’ and what have you ‘learned’ that you’re not ‘doing’? (sigh)


History, Geography … Whatever

After weeks of anticipation (picture the Heinz bottle with Carly singing if you’re old enough – make sure you stretch adequately first) last week I finally got my “high-speed Internet access”. I signed up with the new AT&T fixed wireless service. Two guys worked outside to get the antenna installed, while a computer tech came inside to install a network interface card in my computer and install the software. I talked with him for a few minutes while he was killing time, waiting on the outside guys to finish.

I asked him where their main office was.

He gave me a somewhat puzzled look, and responded, “Redmond? Is there a Redmond? I think it’s Redmond. I don’t know where that is. I don’t really know my history.”

Now, I admit that my first thought upon hearing that (“I don’t really know my history”) was, “Oh, my! Newsletter fodder!” But upon further review, I’ve been thinking about that. And I’m wondering … what if somebody went through their entire life always confusing “history” with “geography”?

On the one hand, that constitutes pretty basic ‘knowledge’ that “everyone ought to know”. On the other hand, if you were in a conversation about where in California you could find the best vineyards and you said, “I don’t know, I was poor in history”, does that really denote any less ‘knowledge’ than just saying, “I don’t know”?

Not knowing his “history” from his “geography” didn’t prevent the guy from properly installing my NIC card, and getting the software up and running, and doing his job to get me high-speed access to the Internet.
[2019 note: as I recall the “high speed” in this case was about 384KB, or about .4MB.]


You Say Verbatim, I Say Verboten

In his excellent, if unconventional, textbook Composing: Writing as a Self-Creating Process, William E. Coles, Jr. relates an anecdote about Charles Edward Garman while a student in the Yale Divinity School, circa 1872:

Early in the session … Professor Fisher asked us to read fifty pages in his book, The Beginnings of Christianity, and the next day called on Garman to recite first. Garman began with the first line and went through to the end of the hour verbatim et literatim.

Think about that. Think about … what if, as a student … you could memorize everything that you read? How well do you think you would do on tests? How well do you think you would do on standardized tests, like the SAT and ACT?

Wouldn’t that capability satisfy most of what we, as parents and tax-paying employers of teachers, expect as evidence of performance, as ‘proof’ of ‘education’? I’d bet you would know your “history” from your “geography”.

And yet … think about the dozens, hundreds or thousands of other means of ‘learning’ we (most of us) employ. We pridefully begin teaching our baby kids “what we know”, and then we ship them off to schools so that other ‘adults’ can teach them “what they know” and “what the books say”, and for the most part we obliviously ignore (or ignorantly remain oblivious to) the fact that kids ‘learn’ so very much more than what they are ‘taught’. And then you reach ‘our’ age (pandering to the first standard deviation of my readership here) and it’s like, “I need to take a course to learn about ME!”

Okay, so you go to Barnes and Noble and you read, and memorize, every book on the Self-Help, Self-Improvement shelves. You can answer any question that anybody can ask about what the authors say in all the books.

And what have you ‘learned’?


Disregarding What We Already ‘Know’

If the world has nearly destroyed itself, it is not from lack of knowledge in the sense that we lack the knowledge to cure cancer or release atomic energy, but is due to the fact that the mass of men have not applied to public policy knowledge which they already possess, which is indeed of almost universal possession, deducible from the facts of everyday life.

If this is true – and it seems inescapable – then no education which consists mainly in the dissemination of “knowledge” can save us. If men can disregard in their policies the facts they already know, they can just as easily disregard new facts which they do not at present know. What is needed is the development in men of that particular type of skill which will enable them to make social use of knowledge already in their possession; enable them to apply simple, sometimes self-evident, truths to the guidance of their common life. – Sir Norman Angell, 1942


Completing a Thought

Driving to work the other day, I passed a shiny new black Volvo station wagon. I first noticed two young (3rd or 4th grade, I imagined) girls sitting in the “way back” seat, facing me as I pulled from behind them into the passing lane. (Okay, this is Texas … the left passing lane.) Pulling alongside, I saw three more girls in the middle seat and one in the front seat. They all looked about the same age, and I noticed they seemed to be wearing school uniforms of the plaid skirt, white blouse variety. The Breck-hair in-between-Junior-League-meetings soccermomchauffeur drove while talking on a cell phone. A picture of surburban private school normality.

Something bothered me about this picture.

The ‘something’ resolved itself a few miles up the road. I remembered meeting a buddy at Balls Hamburgers, near Midway and Northwest Hwy in Dallas, last fall for lunch. This area is somewhat near the Hockaday School, a well-known private ‘old-school’ girls school in Dallas. While we were there, I watched as two late-model cars drove up and parked together – one a BMW, the other a Mercedes. Three girls were in each. I noticed that, instead of getting out of their cars, they continued to sit while they each finished their cigarettes. Then all six sprang out and spritely walked into the restaurant, each almost indistinguishable from the other in their plaid skirts and white blouses.


Fading Away …

While visiting a friend in Houston a few weeks ago, she repeated some words that seemed wise to me. Paraphrasing, “Nothing in nature grows without shedding.

This was said in the context of personal growth and development, the evolution of relationships, etc. But I wonder … if it’s an aphorism appropriate to nature … and if it applies to individuals and relationships … does it also apply to cultures, traditions, societies, institutions, etc.?

The Associated Press recently reported that one of the casualities of the down-sizing of the U.S. Armed Forces is a shortage of buglers to play “Taps” at funerals. The services recently authorized the use of a recorded version played on compact disc players for official military honors ceremonies. “Taps” dates back to the Civil War, and has been officially recognized by the Army since 1874.

The Paiute (Native American) Preschool Language Immersion Program is trying to preserve their tribal language in southwest Utah. Of their 744 members, less than 40 speak the language. With a 1997 Department of Health and Human Services grant, the tribe surveyed its members across the state and discovered that only about 3% of its members used the language on a daily basis. Today, ten 3- and 4-year-olds are enrolled in the preschool program at tribal headquarters in an attempt to stave off elimination of their ‘native’ language. Darryl Kipp of the Piegan Institute in Montana, which works for the preservation of native tongues, predicts, “Out of 185 native languages still viable today, less than 20 will survive in the next 50 years.”

The Los Angeles Times reports that the Polish government has recently enacted a law which requires that whenever foreign words are used in public business activities or legal documents, translation into Polish words must be provided. “This is really protecting people who don’t know the foreign language,” explains Professor Jadwiga Puzynina, a Warsaw University professor who sits on the Polish Language Council, “the supreme body for deciding what is or is not a Polish word.” Iwona Zaczek, spokeswoman at the Consumer and Competition Protection Office, says, “I think Poles are quite patriotic, and in some sense this law strengthens in them the feeling of the importance of their language.” The law does not affect proper names and does not ban the use of English or other languages. The Council regularly issues new translated words and their correct Polish spellings. (Did that phrase get through everybody’s oxymoron filters?) Some of the ‘new’ Polish words: syskdzokej (disc jockey); fanklub (fan club); dzojstik (joystick); lancz (lunch); and pank (punk).


AND FINALLY – Following up on Internet protection

Fortuitously timed after my last newsletter, the June 11th Dallas Morning News contained an editorial by Bart McKay, “an attoryney in the Internet and e-commerce group of the Dallas-based law firm Hughes & Luce.” McKay informs us that “As part of the Child Online Protection Act of 1998, Congress created the 19-member Commission on Online Child Protection and charged it with studying various methods and technologies to reduce minors’ access to harmful Internet material.”

Among the measures under consideration for inclusion in the commission’s report (due out in November, according to McKay): Making the use of “one-click-away” resources mandatory at “all Internet starting points (such as every Internet service provider’s start page)”. This means that every “starting point” page would be required to provide a link to GetNetWise.org and/or other such sites which offer “child protection resources”. Adopting an age verification system, in which a user would have to provide an “independent third-party service” with information such as a credit card number to verify age. Once confirmed, the user would be granted some type of electronic certificate or number which would allow her access to “adult sites”. Creating specific “adult domains”.

For example, instead of having a .com or .net address, sites with designated “adult content” would be required to register as .xxx. Or conversely, sites with “kid safe” content could register within the domain .kids. Implementing a labeling, or rating system, and/or filtering system. Filtering systems use text recognition to block access to pages. [For example, if in this newsletter I wrote that, “An example of a word that newspapers won’t print is ‘sh_t'”, your filtering software would probably not let you access this page.] Labeling would require that every (every!) website be ‘rated’ according to some unstated criteria – either ‘voluntarily’ or by a third-party rating process.

[Jun 19th: I’ve already been asked by one regular reader, “What’s up? Is your server down? I couldn’t load your newsletter page.” So I changed what was an “i” to the “_” in the ‘bad’ word above. If you have filtering software installed and want to see if it (your software) finds it (my newsletter reference to the “sh_t” word) objectionable, click here.] What do you think about these measures? Are they reasonable? Would they be effective? Why? Why not?


Readers React

I read with interest the comments on the issue of pornography and the public libraries. When my son was 15, I asked my husband about what goes on with boys sexually at this age. He told me more than I wanted to know. I also religiously read Ann Landers and one day, she addressed the topic in a column. When I found a copy of Playboy Magazine, I almost died. Ann had said, “now if this happens, just put the magazine back where you found it and DO NOT SAY ANYTHING ABOUT IT!” That’s exactly what I did. Case closed. For several days, I could hardly look at my son without experiencing total embarrassment. And then I forgot about the whole thing. One day, my son walked up to me and said, “Mom, I was wondering if it would be okay for me to SUBSCRIBE to Playboy”. My mouth began spewing out these words, “No, son, because you have a little sister and she shouldn’t be seeing such things around this house. She is just not mature enough.” And guess what? IT WORKED. – a Texas mother

As regards children and pornography, the questions asked by the author in the respective article do not adequately address the issue: children have a developing sexuality; subject to imprinting. Many of the fetishes which both positively and negatively impact adult sexuality arise from early, unintentional imprinting.

Interestingly, Japanese culture along with its strict codes of behavior regarding sexuality and pornography also has a long tradition of erotic fetishism. An entire industry has arisen which serves the fetishistic interests of Japanese businessmen in a non-explicit manner. This often involves “theme” bars in which the hostesses wear a costume and behave in ways to excite the fetish of the patrons. This practice rarely involves sexual conduct or explicit sexual behavior. Rather, it fuels the libido which the patron supposedly takes home and expresses in culturally acceptable and personally respectful ways with his spouse.
It seems, whether in a sexually liberal or in a sexually repressive culture, fetishism arises.

Rightfully or wrongfully, productively or counter-productively, consciously or subconsciouly, those who attempt to limit the exposure of children to pornography do so in order to protect their children’s developing sexuality from any confusion which might interfere with sexual happiness as adults. The character of that protection varies from culture to culture, sometimes expressing itself in wonderous and mysterious ways; and still, the intent to regulate developing sexuality seems universal amongst all cultures, including those which tolerate sexual behavior nominally abhorrent to western european sensibilities, such as child prostitution. – in Bend, OR

In reference to your “Yeah ‘RIGHT’!” comment in regards to the story on filtering out Internet pornography in Holland, Michigan [in which a mother claimed that “pornographic pictures started popping up on the screen” while on the library’s Internet] … Actually that just happened to me. I wanted to book a trip to Belize. Often when I don’t have the exact web address, I guess the site name. Type in the address www.elitetravel.com and tell me what you see. – in Plano

Chanticleer #17

Chanticleer
I do not propose to write an ode to dejection, but to brag as lustily as chanticleer in the morning, standing on his roost, if only to wake my neighbors up. 

Henry David Thoreau

June 5, 2000


Chanticleer sticks his neck out to say a few words on the subject of “protection”. My daughter and her friend did some yard work for me last week. They remembered to apply sun screen on their faces, but unfortunately, forgot about protecting their backs. A few hours later, and for several days afterward, they painfully remembered.

Using sunscreen, or clothing, or a hat, to protect one’s skin against burning from the sun amounts to a straightforward, pretty much non-controversial, incontrovertible and not inconsequential act. However, we oftentimes engage in efforts that, while they ostensibly aim to protect, they many times do not represent a sensible, or sense-able, thought process.

To wit:

BIRD BRAINS

From the Dallas Morning News (DMN)… The Hurst-Euless-Bedford school district, with approval of the city of Euless and the U.S. Fish and Wildlife Service (USFWS), cleared eight wooded acres of district-owned land in preparation for selling the property. For the past 18 years, the woods (referred to as a “rookery”) served as a seasonal home to flocks of egrets and herons. Most of the neighborhood residents considered the birds, their noise and their waste as nuisances and welcomed the action. Others, such as Ms. Beth Stone, attempted to block the rookery razing. Said Ms. Stone, “I’m looking at this and I’m just having a fit. In a sense, it’s necessary, but I don’t know where the birds are going to go.”

Not wanting to sound mean-spirited toward Ms. Stone, but I submit that in the Big Scheme of Things (BSOT), humans don’t need to assume role of Grand Protectors of All Things Living, notwithstanding the nobleness of their intents. Ms. Stone may not “know where the birds are going to go,” but I myself find no fault with her ignorance.

After all, it takes a bird brain to know a bird brain. Over the long term, I’d bet on the birds.


PROTECTING LIBRARIES FROM CYBRERPORN

This is dated by a few months, but I suspect the issue will be repeated around the country.

A local referendum in Holland, Michigan, initiated by a petition drive sponsored by the Mississippi-based American Family Association, sought to cut off city funding to the local library unless the library instituted Internet filtering software. The motivation for the mavens of moral mandate was to offer library patrons (presumably children) protection from “obscene, sexually explicit, or other material harmful to minors.”

Supporters include a mother who said she was using an Internet terminal at the library when “pornographic pictures started popping up on the screen.” Said she, “If it happened to me, it could happen to kids. The library is not doing enough to protect them.”

Another supporter, age 62: “I just think that children really don’t know what’s for their own good.”

A library spokesman replied: “This is a manufactured problem.” The Detroit Free Press reported that: In the four years since the library has had Internet access – not in its children’s area, by the way — there has been only one documented incident of a patron surfing to an inappropriate site. Material was questioned five other times. None of it led to inappropriate behavior in the library.

Meanwhile on the political front, Holland Mayor Pro Tem Craig Rich declared, “I have hopes that the issue will fail on the ballot and the people of the area will then have a sane and sensible discussion … instead of one forced by the American Family Association’s commando tactics.”

Holland voters rejected the proposal 54%-46%.

Chanticleer asks these probing personal questions: Have you ever seen something that you would label as pornography? If you were ‘harmed,’ how were you ‘harmed’? How do you describe the ‘harmful’ effects? If you were not ‘harmed,’ when and how did you learn to not be ‘harmed’? At what age might you expect someone to be ‘harmed’ by whatever you observed that you labeled as pornography? What might be the evidence, or symptoms, of this ‘harm’?

I wish to make two ThisIsNotThat types of distinctions here:

1. Acting to prevent a child from observing, hearing, doing, or saying something that you (and perhaps even a lot of others) find morally, culturally, socially, or religiously “inappropriate” IS NOT the same as “protecting them from harm”.

2. If one fears the effects of ‘something’ that a child might encounter as that child goes about his/her daily business of growing up, preventing the child from encountering the ‘something’ IS NOT the same as preventing the feared effects of that ‘something’. In other words, better to prepare the child for how to deal with, respond to, react to the ‘something’, rather than to (futilely, vainly, and illusorially in most cases) ‘protect’ them from the ‘something’. Or at least, if not “better” … “equally important”.

I wish I could recall which of you suggested this (remind me and I’ll mention you), but a pragmatic solution for other libraries facing this challenge could be as simple as to arrange all the Internet terminals in a circle, with screens facing outward.


PROTECTING LOCKNEY FROM DRUGS

January 2000

The Lockney, Texas school district announces a drug testing policy for all teachers and students from 6th through 12th grade. [Chanticleer is familiar with Lockney, a farming community of 2,100 residents, in the Texas Panhandle, as it sits about 35 miles from my home town. We used to be in the same district.] Parents are asked to sign consent forms allowing their children to be tested. The policy dictates that if the parents refuse to sign the consent forms, the children will be considered as failing a test and disciplined accordingly for a first-time offense: 21-day suspension from extracurricular activities 3 days of in-school suspension 3 sessions of drug counseling Teachers who test positive will be fired.

Superintendent Raymond Lusk defends the testing: “It’s a long story, but society has just brought us to this point. Schools have kind of become all things, and our job description has expanded.”

Parent, and life-long Lockney resident Larry Tannahill disagrees: “What scares me the most, if I do not sign it, they are going to punish my child for what I do, and I definitely do not think that’s right.”

March 2000

Larry Tannahill loses his job at the Floyd County Farm and Ranch Supply store. He and his wife Traci are the only parents in town who refuse to sign the consent form to have their son drug tested. Due to their stance, the American Civil Liberties Union (ACLU) files suit on their behalf against the school district.

Proponents of the drug testing policy include:

Warren Mathis, 64, and a Lockney for almost 60 years: “He has a right to his opinion, but we have a right to ours, too. The people don’t think very good of Larry right now. We’ve got 400 kids we’re trying to help, and one person’s trying to spoil everything… What they’re unhappy with Larry about is he’s the only one against this and he has no good reason. If he doesn’t want to do drug testing, all he has to do is pull him (his son) out and send him to Plainview. We’re not forcing him to do this.”

Debbie Montandon says a majority want the testing: “As adults, we have options everywhere we turn. I’m opposed to people outside [ACLU] making decisions for what we want right here in town.”

Bobby Hill: “I think what people in Lockney most want people to realize is this: Number 1, there is a drug problem in our community; Number 2, it took a decade to arrive at this policy; Number 3, this is what an overwhelming majority of those in Lockney wanted; Number 4, it is doing exactly what we wanted done.”

Seven hundred people attend a town hall meeting to discuss the controversy. Many supporters wear red and white t-shirts in unity. About half-a-dozen supporters speak on behalf of the policy, each receiving a standing ovation and applause. Only Larry Tannahill and his lawyer speak against the policy, whose comments generate no noticeable reaction from the attendees. The school board takes no action, leaving the drug testing policy in place.

The next morning, Tannahill is fired. His employer, Lindan Morris, defends the action due to excessive absence and says the action was not a reaction to the controversy. He admits that some customers have quit coming to the store because of Tannahill’s presence. Morris observes: “Instead of being confrontational, people just avoid each other.”

Tannahill has no plans to leave town and is thankful that the impact on his son, Brady, has been minimized. He says that Brady has not been ostracized or experienced any negative incidents.

“It’s kind of amazing to me that the kids in school are acting more adult than the adults are.”

May 2000

In its response to a federal lawsuit filed against it by the ACLU, the Lockney school district states that its drug testing policy does not violate the constitutional rights of 12-year-old Brady Tannahill. The district’s statement declares that the policy constitutes the community’s solution to a drug problem.

Questioning observations: If you assume that a “drug problem” results from a certain set of conditions, environments, factors, considerations, etc., … how much does post-behavior testing and punishment affect those underlying conditions, environments, factors, considerations, etc.? Is it possible that there are some social and group behavior characteristics and attitudes that might constitute a graver threat to a community than a “drug problem”?


STANDARDIZED TESTS

January 2000

A report by the Center on Education Policy and the American Youth Policy Forum says that “public schools are doing a better job of educating the nation’s children and preparing them for college.”

The report cites an increase of 17 points on the math portion of the SAT standardized test from 1983 to 1999, and a 2-point rise on the verbal portion. The report also stated a 14-percent increase in the number of students attending college in 1997 compared to 1983.

January 2000 U.S. District Judge Edward Prado ruled that the Texas mandatory graduation test (TAAS – Texas Assessment of Academic Skills) is not discriminatory against minority students. Since enacted by law in 1990, about 100,000 Texas students have been denied a high school diploma because they repeatedly failed the test. About three-quarters (75%) of those denied graduation were black or Hispanic.

However, the Judge judged that: “While the TAAS test does adversely affect minority students in significant numbers, the [state] has demonstrated an educational necessity for the test, and the plaintiffs [the Mexican American Legal Defense and Educational Fund] have failed to identify equally effective alternatives.”

The graduation test is first given to students as sophomores, who then have several opportunities over the next two years to take and pass the test. The test includes skills and material generally taught at the eighth-grade level and is not considered ‘difficult’.

Texas Attorney General John Cornyn: “Thanks to Judge Prado’s decision, Texas can continue to prepare its children for higher education and the world beyond. The TAAS test includes material that all students should know and need to know in order to reach their potential.”

Presidential candidate and part-time-Texas-governor George Dubya Bush: “I am pleased that the judge agrees that the achievement gap in Texas is rapidly improving, more so than students in other parts of the country.”
April 2000 – A “record” 80 percent of Texas high school sophomores passed the graduation test this year (which tests primarily 8th-grade material). State Education Commissioner Jim Nelson: “This definitely qualifies as a red-letter day for Texas education.” Passing rates increased among blacks from 60% to 67%; Hispanics from 64% to 70%; whites from 86% to 89%.

Sometimes-Texas-Governor-Bush: “Texas continues to lead the nation in closing the achievement gap, especially among African-American and Hispanic students. When we insist on high standards and real accountability, our educators and students rise to the challenge.”

Observation:There’s a business aphorism that goes – What gets measured gets done. While one may not argue with Mr. Cornyn’s statement that all students “should know and need to know” the material that the TAAS test covers, I believe one can argue that the test cannot cover ALL that a student might need to know. If one focuses too narrowly on the measuring device, one risks losing sight of what’s supposed to be measured. The consequence becoming that the only thing a yardstick is good for is measuring a yardstick.


PROTECTING EUROPEAN-AMERICANS


In January, David Duke, the former KKK leader, organizer of the National Association for the Advancement of White People, and Louisiana state legislator, announced the creation of a new organization called the National Organization For European American Rights.

Said Duke at the National Press Club press conference: they (white European Americans) face “massive discrimination” “European Americans must band together as a group the same way African-Americans do, the same way other minorities do.” “European Americans face a situation where we’re going to be out-numbered and out-voted in our own country.”

“I guarantee there are many European Americans who are refugees in our own cities. We like our values. We like our culture. We want to preserve it.”

Citing low white birth rates, inter-racial marriages and immigration rates, “The destruction of a specific entity of people, it’s called genocide. If the present immigration rates continue … the European-American people will basically be lost as an entity. We are losing our heritage and our way of life.” In February, according to the DMN again, No Fear, Inc., the maker of sporting apparel and equipment, filed suit against David Duke and his organization accusing them of trademark infringement by calling their new group NOFEAR.


AND FINALLY

Last January, the KKK ‘won’ the right to sponsor a one-mile stretch of Interstate 55 south of St. Louis in the states’ Adopt-A-Highway clean-up campaign. In response, some state legislators threatened to re-name that particular stretch of highway in honor of Rosa Parks, the civil rights pioneer from Alabama.

This update from St. Louis: State Senator William (Lacy) Clay, Jr. introduced an amendment to the highway bill to rename a stretch of I-55, in predominately white south St. Louis County, “Rosa Parks Highway.” This is the same stretch of highway that the KKK has a sign posted as the group that is responsible for cleaning up the highway. (There is a question as to whether or not they actually have cleaned up the highway – who would know, dressed up in their sheets and white cover-all hats and all??? (ha))

The sign, defended by the ACLU, has been up less than 24 hours each time it has been erected (about 3 or 4 times now). “Somebody” has run it over with a truck, stolen it and cut it down with a chain saw. The last “somebody”, a white male from the area, was so outraged when he saw the sign he immediately pulled over, cut it down and was promptly arrested by local law enforcement.

There, my friend, is the real story.

Governor Carnahan signed the bill this week, making it law.

BTW: Senator Clay is the son of William Clay, Sr. Congressman, 1st District (D) Missouri. Carnahan is opposing Senator Aschroft for Missouri US Senate.

Election year stunt or the right thing to do? YOU MAKE THE CALL!